Sunday, February 3, 2013

FEMMES DE SADE!


Hey kids, our good pal Christopher takes this weeks review!  So pop on that new Tegan and Sara album, pour some chamomile tea and sink right in!

*WARNING*
All movies reviewed for SUNDAY SNUFF contain graphic depictions that may include rape, live animals being murdered, and extreme gore.  None of the writers condone such acts we just watch this shit. 

Hello.  My name is Christopher, King of the Witches and I'm here to do an occasional review.  You may know me from The Uneasy Archive or King of the Witches, but if you don't, those are video companies that deal in filth.  And by filth I mean porn.  And by porn I mean roughies.  And the occasional gore, sleaze, slasher, rape revenge, shot on video release.  In the nine or so months that I've been with the Uneasy Archive I've probably subjected myself to more extreme cinema and Golden Age pornography than I have in the past twenty-five years and what better way to purge it all from my system than through reviews?  Right.

Last year The Uneasy Archive released its second film, Femmes De Sade, which slowly became one of my favorite films.  I know, its porn.  How can that rank in my top films?  Easily.  While watching these films I often find myself thinking about them without the graphic sex scenes.  Think of films that got X-rated and non-X-rated releases.  If you took out a lot of the sex scenes from Femmes De Sade, sure it would be lacking a lot of important scenes, but it would still hold a very strong storyline. Like I said, it became one of my favorite films and definitely my favorite Uneasy Archive release to date, ranking above Wet Wilderness and even Water Power. So, that says a lot.

As a collector and lover of films, I'd been seeking out the very rare original release of the film on VHS, which comes in a strange metallic, oversized slipcases with a generic clamshell inside, for months. It had been on eBay once before and I lost it. But recently I came across another copy.  So, as a sort of victory dance, here's a review:

If you're not familiar with the film it's about a convict, Rocky De Sade(played by the massive Ken Turner) being released into the world and almost immediately after being released he's back at what I'm assuming got him locked up in the first place.  Rape.  And assault.  But more importantly rape.  Anyway, big dude ends up on the steamy streets of San Francisco sodomizing prostitutes and bullying helpless a helpless porn store clerk and his friends, who just so happen to be throwing the biggest fuckfest of the century, which Rocky plans on crashing. Eventually the prostitutes get fed up with having this eight foot tall, mustachioed gorilla sticking bottles up their twats and beating them senseless. So, with the knowledge that De Sade will be in attendance our heroine whores turn the fuckfest into an ambush while still maintaining their original fuckfest plans.  Poor old Rocky gets sodomized, defecated on, pissed on, beat, and then to add insult to injury the entire party traipses around the defeated monster while a jazz bands sings an overly catchy song about what just happened.  So yeah, if you don't think that that sounds like an awesome movie, I don't know what's wrong with you. Also, if you're into golden age porn, this movie has one of the most star spangled casts. It's got Annette Haven, John Leslie, Candida Royale, Leslie Bovee and the aforementioned Ken Turner.  Not to mention that it was made by the king himself, Alex DeRenzy.

I guess people like breakdowns, so here you go:
Violence: No blood or guts, but there's some great woman beating. So 7/10
Sex: It's a porno... 10/10
Bizarre Sexual Bullshit: Fake poop, real pee, self-sucking, bottle sodomy, puppy scene, blahblahblah. 9/10
Boobs: Lots of them. 10/10

It really is just an awesome movie and it gets a 10/10 as far as I'm concerned.





For Christopher's previous review click here!

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